Are you having a hard time dealing with the divorce because all you want is to get your wife back? You and your wife may be separated but it doesn’t mean that you have stopped loving her.
There may have been a lot of misunderstandings between the two of you and now you’re wondering if you can get your wife back even after a divorce. Actually, you can. Divorce may seem final because of all those legal papers but then again, not even legal paperwork can control how you really feel about your wife.
So what do you need to do to win your wife back?
Stop begging and making fake promises
Just like in any relationship, begging someone to come back to you won’t work. Neither will making fake promises that you have changed for the better or things will be different from now on. Actions speak louder than words and your wife needs to see these changes before she’s convinced. Don’t reveal your suffering and desperation or blame her for what’s happened. She needs to come to terms in her own way in her own time.
Be realistic with your expectations
No one is perfect, not you or your wife. Perhaps one of the reasons for the divorce is because you have such unrealistic expectations. You need to tone it down and learn to appreciate the good qualities your wife has. Your expectations may have let her feel that she’s not appreciated or she’s not good enough for you. But this is the woman who vowed to be with you and she accepted you for who you are so you need to do the same for her.
Don’t lie to yourself
You need to be honest with yourself in order to get your feelings in order. A divorce is stressful and it doesn’t just affect you and your wife. It will also affect your kids and it can tear a family apart. So you need to ask yourself why you want or need your wife back. You need to decide if your reasons for trying to get her back are enough for you to fight for the relationship.
Say goodbye to negative emotions
You’re feeling hurt and angry and maybe even betrayed. But if you’re going to sit down with your wife and talk things through then you’re going to have to get rid of these negative emotions. Otherwise, tempers will flare and you will end up right back where you started. You won’t be able to communicate properly and hear each other out if you’re itching to yell at each other.
Don’t be afraid to seek outside help
This isn’t just a breakup between a boyfriend and girlfriend, this is a divorce. It’s more complicated so outside help can be a good thing. A professional counselor can guide you and help you reconcile your differences so that you can start fresh.
The truth is, it can get complicated trying to get your wife back. You also need to be prepared that it would take a while, maybe even months before you can convince her to open up to you and maybe see you again. You just have to be patient.